Look what I got in the mail you guys. Woot Woot!
I’m so excited! I love getting exclusive invitations in the mail.
Sorry, for those of you who aren’t bilingual, like me, (although to be accurate I am manylingual) here is the translation:
My buddy Finn is turning two.
Hurray, there’s going to be a par-tay! Love, love, love birthday parties.
Here’s a picture of Finn and me at his first birthday party:
We were eating cake, cause that’s what you do on your birthday. And now he’s turning two! Wow, they grow up so … Hey, wait a minute.
I never had a birthday party when I turned two.
There were no invitations, no balloons, no cake, no presents.
No presents!? No. There. were. no. presents.
How did these people forget such a momentous occasion? I am going to have to check with my agent.
Pretty sure these people owe me something, like an amazing surprise party with Pink as special guest, or a dinner cruise, or a weekend in the Swiss alps. Just saying.